Okay; it's been over two months and I have no one to blame but my lazy-ass self ("self-deprication", for me, it's a good thing).
I got a job at the hospital, much better than slinging coffee or selling bicycles. I get to do the job I always wanted to do, with some great people, in a great community. I feel fufilled for the first time in a long time.
Craig and I still bitch. Not as much, it would seem. Which is funny since we quit smoking earlier this week. I think I'm just naturally part smoker. Or I've just been around it too much... it seems normal to me. I'm not craving it all the time, just with intensity for 20-30 seconds. I keep reminding myself that the reason for quitting isn't for MY health, but for any future children Craig and I should have.
...Then, just yesterday we heard the big news...
Our neighbours, Tabitha and Michael had their baby three weeks early!!! They came home yesterday after a few days in the Walkerton hospital. Calia is a beautiful teeny-little girl; with her dad's nose and her mom's mouth. I wanted to steal her and run away. It was all I could do to keep from crying. She really is the perfect baby.
Mike is acting like a different human being. He's more relaxed, probably because he's exhausted, but he's chilling out a little. He had me take photos of them at the door. The look like the perfect family.
It's only a matter of time before my biological clock starts to deafen me. The funny thing is I think Craig hears it more than I do! LOL
My point is, life keeps moving here. Not in a rush, not at a standstill. Just like a river, we all roll with it to see where we end up. I'm not scared like I was in Toronto. I make connections with people, people I can trust and respect. And I can hope and have dreams, like a little Calia of my own. Just letting myself have that thought is a step in the right direction.
This is home. I may not be a "lifer" (as they call them in-town), but this is where I'm making my life. And I love it.
